Latest news with #emotional support
BBC News
16 hours ago
- BBC News
Children in police custody cells offered Childline call
Children who are taken into police custody in Glasgow are being offered a call to Childline in a scheme aimed at offering emotional support and reducing the likelihood of Scotland said being held in a police cell could be a "frightening" experience for young people who are often vulnerable and have complex part of the scheme, under-19s will be given information about the confidential helpline run by children's charity, the NSPCC, and the chance to talk to a comes as a review of police custody facilities in Glasgow earlier this year raised concerns that several children were held in cells for an "inappropriate" length of time. More than 3,700 young people aged 12 to18 were taken into police custody across Scotland between April 2024 and March this year.680 held overnight and 204 held for more than 24 hours. Last month, a Scottish Police Authority report highlighted a higher frequency of younger people being accused of crimes in recent said those aged 16, 17 and 18 were most likely to be accused of serious violence while 11 to 15-year-olds committed crimes relating to violence and threatening behaviour. That younger age group had an increased prevalence for carrying weapons and there had been an increase in the number of young females becoming involved in acts of violence, the report changing nature of gangs and the exploitation of vulnerable young people was identified as a growing Mairi MacInnes, from Police Scotland's Criminal Justice Services Division, said children and young people were often at the "point of crisis" when they are detained."They are very vulnerable and often have very complex needs, both personally and emotionally which often plays out in their behaviour," she said."Clearly being in a custody environment does not help, which is why we work with partners to try and find them support and safe accommodation elsewhere."The senior officer said young people may feel more comfortable talking to Childline about their problems than police officers. The scheme follows a 10-week pilot at Glasgow's London Road Police Custody Unit which has been adapted to be a "calmer" environment for young people. Children were offered books, jigsaw puzzles and soft toys - and the cells have brightly coloured murals on the walls, with posters carrying the Childline helpline number on the Sgt Derek Taggart, who is based at the station, said coming into custody could be a frightening experience for children, particularly if it was their first said: "We get people from all walks of life and they're all very vulnerable for a number of circumstances. "Childline are able to bridge that gap that the police cannot."It's someone for them to talk to and provide advice because sometimes the police are not always the 'go-to' and it's a confidential call." Of the 107 young people brought into custody during the pilot, 97% accepted an information leaflet about the service. It is not known how many contacted the helpline as the service is Burke, Childline team manager in Glasgow, said young people in custody who contact them often say they feel afraid and said: "There could be a number of reasons why a child is in custody."It's not always as straight forward as people might think - it could be conflict going on at home, it could be exploitation. "But what they always say to us is that they feel very alone. "So we want to provide that emotional support so that they know they are not alone."Childline are here 24 hours a day so, at any point that they get taken in, they can call us and just have a chat and take some time to calm down."She said sometimes children just want someone to talk to, but counsellors can direct them to other services. The Glasgow project is the first in Scotland and Police Scotland and the NSPCC are hoping to roll it out across the country. The service was originally launched in Merseyside in 2023 and rolled out across Cheshire the following March HM Inspectorate of Constabulary in Scotland (HMCIS) and Healthcare Improvement Scotland (HIS) examined three police custody centres in the city and found five occasions where children had been held in cells for longer than deemed has called for "robust management oversight" from Police Scotland over decisions to detain children in Scotland and the Scottish Police Authority say police custody is no place for children and young people, but is sometimes necessary when no alternatives are available.A Police Scotland spokesman said custody suites at London Road and Glasgow Cathcart had been adapted for young people as part of a "trauma informed approach to improve the environment when children are detained."
Yahoo
4 days ago
- Health
- Yahoo
11 Things the Most Emotionally Supportive Grandparents Do Differently, According to a Psychologist
11 Things the Most Emotionally Supportive Grandparents Do Differently, According to a Psychologist originally appeared on Parade. Close your eyes and picture your favorite memories with your grandparents when you were growing up. If those moments were warm, fuzzy and full of love, you very likely had emotionally supportive grandparents. Although much of the emotional support a child receives comes from the parent or parents, this is an area where grandmas and grandpas can also contribute. 'Grandparents can play a very key role in a grandchild's emotional development,' says A. Biller, Psy.D., Director, Mental Health at the Audrey Hepburn Children's House at Hackensack University Medical Center. This emotional support is best carried out as a partnership between primary caregivers and grandparents. Ahead, discover the key things that emotionally supportive grandmothers and grandfathers do Grandparents Who Make the Biggest Impact on Their Grandkids Usually Do These 10 Things, Psychologists Say Why Is It Important To Be Emotionally Supportive of Grandchildren? Dr. Biller says that grandmothers and grandfathers have the distinct perspective of being able to provide love, support and care with far fewer daily parenting stressors and limitations that parents face. He adds that it's well-established that positive attachment between children and their grandparents results in decreased depressive symptoms, in both single parent families as well as in families in which children maintain strong relationships with their parents. 'Similarly, a secure emotional attachment between grandparents and grandchildren can mitigate the negative impact of less than ideal parental mental health and general functioning,' he explains. Dr. Biller also indicates that the positive attachment between grandparents and their grandchildren has beneficial impacts on grandparents themselves. In other words? Everyone wins when it comes to emotional Child Psychologists Are Begging Parents and Grandparents To Stop Asking These 10 Questions 11 Things the Most Emotionally Supportive Grandparents Do Differently, According to a Psychologist Here are some characteristics that set these grandmas and grandpas apart. 1. They Spend Quality Time With Their Grandchildren Dr. Biller says that when emotionally supportive grandparents spend time with their grandchildren, they do so in a manner that's felt in a sincere and genuine way. For example, when sharing a meal with a granddaughter or grandson, the grandparent will talk with the grandchild and be curious about the things that are meaningful to them, from school to relationships. Or, if a grandparent attends a grandkid's performance or game, the grandma or grandpa minimizes distractions such as phones and conversations and is there fully.'Although we think that our grandchildren are occupied with their activities, they are also tuned in to see how they are being taken in,' Dr. Biller says. 'Similarly, there is significant value in being able to discuss and process what the child engaged in after the activity.' Related: 2. They Respect Family Boundaries Emotionally supportive grandparents recognize the boundaries established by their grandchild's primary caregivers. 'It is not uncommon for grandparents to overlook the value of boundaries when attempting to provide unbridled love and kindness,' Dr. Biller says, adding that when a grandparent provides this love, the acts shouldn't be in opposition to the parents' wishes. When this happens, Dr. Biller says that it can bring on 'significant conflict and emotional confusion.' 3. They Listen to Their Grandchildren 'As is necessary in any meaningful relationship, it is imperative that grandparents fully listen to their grandchildren,' Dr. Biller says. 'The listening that is necessary involves more than auditory listening. It is essential that grandparents listen with their ears, eyes and other senses to ensure that they are responses to actual needs and respectful of their grandchild's boundaries.' Related: 4. They Share Life Experiences Emotionally supportive grandparents share their abundance of life experiences with their grandchildren.'It is imperative when sharing life experiences that grandparents do so in a realistic manner, sharing candor and humility,' Dr. Biller says. 'Grandchildren will learn best when grandparents share the reason that their experiences had an impact rather than simply describing the experience.' 5. They Provide Companionship Dr. Biller notes that while stories, hugs and smiles add quality to the time spent between grandparents and grandkids, consistency and reliability is important when it comes to companionship. In fact, this grandparent/grandchild relationship can serve as a foundation for a grandchild's expectation for later relationships. Related: 6. They Foster Emotional Socialization Although emotions tend to be experienced organically, Dr. Biller says that deliberate emotional development is primarily achieved through experience and exploration, something that can also be referred to as 'emotional socialization.' 'It is very beneficial for grandparents to be emotionally expressive and explain to their grandchildren the emotional impact of their interactions,' Dr. Biller says. 'Through discussions of emotional experiences, grandparents enhance their grandchildren's understanding of the nuances of different emotions and gain comfort speaking about their feelings.' Related: 7. They Serve as Role Models and Mentors 'As we all know, children learn from what we do, rather than what we say,' Dr. Biller explains. 'It should not be a surprise that grandparents who provide good examples through their actions have a positive emotional impact on their grandchildren's wellbeing.' Related: 6 Ways Kids Benefit From Spending Time With Grandparents, a Child Psychologist Reveals 8. They Act as "Historians' Dr. Biller says that emotionally supportive grandparents act as 'historians' of their families, explaining family traditions, values and ethnic heritage in detail. 'Grandparents serve a key role in linking past generations to future generations,' he shares. 'Through engaged retelling of stories about family members, grandchildren better understand their personal and cultural heritage.' 9. They Model Appropriate Emotional Expression According to Dr. Biller, emotionally supportive grandparents model 'appropriate emotional expression' and 'provide guidance on coping with strong emotions.' 'Through activities such as active play and reading with grandchildren, grandparents can serve an important role in teaching children how to manage and express their emotions,' he explains. 'When reading with children, it is best if grandparents are able to face their grandchildren, so that the child learns about emotions through listening to voice intonation as well as viewing facial expressions.' Related: 10. They Maintain Support Into Adulthood Dr. Biller says that the positive impact of emotional support from grandparents does not end at age 18, 'and why should it?' he adds. He goes on to say, 'The time and effort that is invested into an emotionally supportive relationship between a grandparent and child is beneficial throughout young adulthood and beyond. Personal growth does not have an end and, therefore, if a grandchild is fortunate to maintain a secure relationship with a grandparent, beyond their adolescence and into young adulthood, the grandchild is able to adapt their functioning based on the lessons and experiences that they learned from during their early interactions with their grandparents.' 11. They Love Unconditionally Emotionally supportive grandparents love unconditionally, but have 'appropriate boundaries' as Dr. Biller states. Although grandparents tend to play by 'a different set of rules' than parents, as Dr. Biller points out, he says that it's still imperative that grandparents respect the boundaries of their grandchildren and children. 'Loving unconditionally includes being mindful of how acts of love are expressed and how they are received,' he concludes. Up Next:Source: Brett A. Biller, Psy.D., Director, Mental Health at the Audrey Hepburn Children's House at Hackensack University Medical Center 11 Things the Most Emotionally Supportive Grandparents Do Differently, According to a Psychologist first appeared on Parade on Jul 19, 2025 This story was originally reported by Parade on Jul 19, 2025, where it first appeared. Solve the daily Crossword
UAE Moments
5 days ago
- General
- UAE Moments
Daily Love Tarot Reading for July 20th, 2025
Daily Love Tarot Reading - 7.20.25 Card of the Day: The Moon The Moon reflects anxiety and illusions. However, in this position, it showcases your ability to use your intuition and kindness to overcome negativity. You are always there to support your partner and help them through their anxieties. You also know how to think things through properly to avoid instability in your relationships. This rational yet caring side of you allows your love life to thrive. For singles: Trust your intuition—love may not be as it seems at first, but your inner wisdom will guide you to the right person. For couples: Open communication is key—help your partner navigate their fears by offering reassurance and emotional support. Pro Tip for the Day: Don't let doubts cloud your judgment. Take a step back, trust your instincts, and allow clarity to lead your heart.
South China Morning Post
6 days ago
- Health
- South China Morning Post
Hong Kong carer hotline to scale up operations after handling 100,000 calls in 2 years
A carer support hotline commissioned by the Hong Kong government handled almost 100,000 calls in nearly two years since its launch, with operations set to be scaled up to meet growing demand. Advertisement Operated by the Tung Wah Group of Hospitals, the 24-hour '182183' hotline provides emotional support and referrals to welfare services. It is staffed by more than 100 social workers, who work in shifts across 30 phone lines. Since its launch in September 2023, amid a spate of family tragedies involving stressed carers, the operator had handled 99,899 calls as of June 30 this year, according to Venus Ho Ka-yi, supervisor of the hotline centre. Venus Ho (centre) says the hotline can arrange in-home respite services. Photo: Nora Tam Most callers sought emotional support, followed by inquiries about services. The team also made 1,744 referrals, including 208 to respite centres, which Ho said was important for carers to buy time to hire a domestic helper or find a residential care home for their loved ones following hospital discharge. A carer, surnamed Lam, in her sixties, called the hotline early one morning in January this year during an emotional meltdown. She had spent the previous four days cleaning up after her 97-year-old mother, who, despite incontinence and mobility issues, refused to use nappies and insisted on going to the toilet unaided. Advertisement 'It was frustrating that she did not listen to me, and I broke down emotionally,' she said. 'I called the hotline asking for respite services, I would take any respite centre no matter how far it is, because I wouldn't be able to survive the night without it.' Lam recalled social workers telling her 'not to worry about money' and swiftly arranging a wheelchair, transport, and a care assistant to send her mother to a respite centre in Sai Wan.
Yahoo
17-07-2025
- General
- Yahoo
I Was Everyone's Unpaid 'Therapist Friend.' Until I Learned This Hard Truth About Friendship.
I don't remember a time when my mum didn't confide in me. I was her emotional support system, her confidant, her closest friend. She was a single parent and I became her sounding board. She shared her problems, fears and daily struggles — not the watered-down version most kids get, but the whole, raw, unfiltered story. As I grew older, I slowly became aware that this wasn't how most mother-daughter relationships worked. But for us, it was just normal. 'Thank you for listening to me rabbit on,' she'd say, perched on my bed, tucking me in. 'You're so grown up for your age.' And I was. Had to be, really. When you're someone's entire world, you learn quickly how to soak up their distress like a sponge. Without either of us realizing it, I absorbed a particular understanding of love. To me, caring for someone meant being the calm in their chaos, their safe harbor. Being needed felt like being valued. But that understanding of what it meant to love someone became the blueprint I carried into subsequent relationships. When Love Meant Being Someone's Lifeline Fast forward to my very early 20s. Somehow, I'd become the group therapist. Not officially, obviously. There was no vote where everyone decided I'd be the one fielding crisis calls at midnight. It just happened the way these things do when you've spent your childhood believing your worth depends on how well you can fix everyone else's mess. 'Many 'designated therapists' were once the emotionally attuned child in a chaotic, unpredictable or emotionally stifled home,' explains Elizabeth Bodett Dresser, licensed clinical professional counselor (LCPC) and founder of Still Oak Counseling. 'Maybe their parents didn't know how to regulate their own emotions, so the child took on the job of smoothing things over — being the peacemaker, the listener, the fixer.' That perpetual caretaking? It becomes what Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy calls a 'manager' part. A protector who discovered how to read the room, anticipate needs and keep everyone stable. As Dresser puts it, 'These parts are often fueled by a belief that your worth comes from what you do for others, not simply who you are.' Building on this foundation, Audrey Schoen, licensed marriage and family therapist, explains that some people learn early on that 'their survival was tied to their ability to solve problems and keep the peace.' We became hypervigilant to everyone's moods because our family's stability depended on it, pushing our own needs aside. 'This doesn't just turn off when they become adults,' Schoen said. 'It becomes their default mode in all relationships.' The signs were everywhere. I knew intimate details about everyone's disasters. Their family drama, relationship trainwrecks, career meltdowns and everything in between. I knew their deepest fears and insecurities and could see a spiral coming a mile away. But ask any of them what was happening in my life? Blank stares. It wasn't malicious. They cared in their own way. But when you're the 'strong and capable' one, people forget you might be hurting, too. They'd throw out the occasional 'How are you?' Then, their eyes would glaze over, waiting for their turn to unload. The Warning Signs I Ignored The exhaustion crept up slowly. Three years of being everyone's unpaid therapist will do that. I'd spend hours crafting the perfect response to someone's emergency text, researching resources and offering solutions, only to have them ignore my advice completely and recreate the same chaos the following week. Canceling my own plans to be there during their worst moments became routine, but when it came to their fun social events, I wasn't even on their radar. I was worn out. I felt like I only mattered when things were falling apart. And I'm not the only one who's felt this way. This pattern is something Samantha Potthoff, marriage and family therapist and co-founder of Therapy Collective of California, regularly sees in people who have become the psychological anchor for everyone around them. 'Many of these people come to therapy not because they're struggling with one particular issue but because they feel emotionally worn out and unseen,' Potthoff said. And there's usually a belief lurking underneath: 'If I stop showing up for everyone, I'll lose my worth or the relationship itself.' According to Potthoff, there are unmistakable signs indicating when supportive behavior has crossed into unhealthy territory: you feel guilty or anxious whenever you try to say no, people expect you to be available but never offer the same in return and your issues go unnoticed while everyone else's take center stage. 'These aren't just red flags,' she said. 'They're often symptoms of emotional burnout.' Looking back, I kept telling myself that this was just temporary stress and things would balance out eventually. But the universe had other plans. When Everything Fell Apart Everything came to a head during one particularly stressful weekend. Three friends, three separate crises, all happening at the same inopportune time. Two servings of relationship drama and a business going under. I spent two days ping-ponging between house visits and marathon phone calls, dispensing wisdom and tissues in equal measure. By Sunday night, I was utterly done. Mentally drained, physically exhausted. I'd eaten nothing but junky stress snacks and absorbed enough secondhand trauma to power a helpline. Then my phone buzzed. I retrieved it from the door pocket of my poor old car. Another drama-filled text, but this time from a fourth friend. I stared at that message for a long time. I searched desperately for something helpful to say, but I was coming up blank. I felt like I had nothing to give. So, I did something revolutionary: I turned off my phone. The guilt hit immediately. What if they really needed me? What if something terrible happened? What if they stopped being my friend because I wasn't available? The same fears that had kept me tethered to my mother's inner needs as a child — the terror that boundaries meant abandonment. This guilt, notes Dresser, is textbook for emotional fixers. 'When your nervous system has been wired to prioritize others' needs as a form of connection or survival, setting a boundary can feel like you're being cruel or selfish. But that guilt often isn't a sign you're doing something wrong. It's a sign you're doing something new.' The Truth About One-Sided Friendships Gradually, I began to pull back and create some distance. As I did, the truth became painfully obvious. The care I'd been giving for so long? Not reciprocated. When I stopped being available for every meltdown, they didn't notice I was struggling with my own. When I moved to a new town not long after, those friendships just... faded. No one fought to maintain the connection when I wasn't doing all the emotional heavy lifting. Healthy relationships should feel mutual, as Dresser points out. 'There's room for both people to be messy, vulnerable and human. But when you find yourself only playing the role of the calm, wise advice-giver, especially when you're privately unraveling, it might be a sign the dynamic is out of balance.' Looking back, I can see how these unhealthy patterns had played out in my own life. The warning signs of an unhealthy dynamic had been there all along, but I missed them completely. I felt dread when certain names popped up on my phone because I knew what was coming — another venting marathon where I'd give everything and get nothing back. My own hardships had become invisible, even to me. Conversations left me weary rather than connected. And if I tried to open up? The discussion quietly pivoted back to them. As Schoen puts it, 'When your support becomes an expectation, you've crossed into unhealthy territory.' In toxic dynamics, it becomes an obligation. You feel it in your body as resentment and exhaustion. She adds, 'Another clear sign is when friends start treating your emotional labor like it's owed to them rather than appreciated.' It took time to unlearn these patterns. Time to understand that real friendship requires mutuality, not one person endlessly giving while the other takes. What I didn't realize was how this cycle of behavior had rewired my sense of self-worth. 'This dynamic creates a warped sense of self-worth that sounds like: 'I'm worthy because of what I can offer others' and 'I'm fine, I can take care of myself,'' Schoen said. The helper starts believing their needs matter less than everyone else's, which is a trauma response, not a personality trait. 'When they struggle, they often think there's something wrong with them because they're supposed to be the strong one, able to handle it all,' she continues. 'The mental health impact can be significant. Chronic stress, resentment and a deep sense of loneliness because nobody really knows the real you.' Those habits still surface sometimes. Even now, I catch myself automatically saying, 'I'm fine' when someone asks how I'm doing. Or jump straight into problem-solving mode when a friend shares something. The difference is that I now notice it happening. Learning To Choose Myself Guilt around these personal limits often comes from being praised for this behavior. As Schoen observes, 'They were the 'good kid,' the responsible one, the one everyone could count on. Being a 'good friend' becomes their identity. Setting boundaries feels like betraying the very identity that kept them safe and valued.' Growing up as a confidant gave me empathy beyond my years and showed me how to hold space for pain without immediately trying to fix it. I developed an intuitive understanding of human nature that serves me well. What changed everything was figuring out how to use these skills intentionally, not reflexively. It's a distinction Potthoff highlights, drawing on research that shows how essential this shift really is. 'People who misunderstand empathy as limitless emotional availability, especially those in caregiving roles, are more vulnerable to burnout,' Potthoff said. 'When empathy is not paired with healthy boundaries and assertive communication, the very quality that helps us connect becomes the source of our fatigue.' Those years of carrying everyone else's stresses taught me lessons I wish I'd learned earlier. The breakthrough came when I stopped seeing my limits as selfish and started seeing them as survival. My well-intentioned help was creating dependency instead of independence. Sometimes, the healthiest thing you can do is step back and let someone handle their disaster when you're running on empty. After all, friendship happens between equals, not between a fixer and the broken. 'Setting a healthy boundary means having empathy and compassion for your friend's pain without taking on their problem or becoming responsible for the solution,' Schoen said. 'You can care about someone without carrying their emotional weight.' These days, I still care deeply about the people in my life. I offer guidance and a listening ear when it's needed. However, I do so by choice, not compulsion and work to maintain my own boundaries. And when those old patterns try to resurface (because they do), I'm better equipped to recognize them and make different choices. The most important lesson? 'You are allowed to rest,' Potthoff said. 'You are allowed to have needs. And you are worthy of the same care you so freely offer to others, not because you've earned it, but because you're human.' Refusing to be someone's constant counselor can be the kindest choice. Not because you don't care, but because you respect their ability to grow on their own. And that benefits everyone. Related... I Couldn't Stop Yelling At My Kids. Then I Uncovered Something Surprising From My Childhood That Was Causing It. 7 Warning Signs Your Friendship Isn't Going To Last 7 Signs You're Being A Bad Friend (And How To Be A Better One) Solve the daily Crossword
